Hot Dogs in the Dark

Blood Diner
Directed by: Jackie Kong
Written by: Michael Sonye
Starring: Rick Burks, Carl Crew & LaNette LaFrance

While reminiscing about video rental stores in my post about my local Blockbuster Video closing down, I was reminded of one of the biggest reasons why I loved visiting video stores when I was younger. While it was great to rent a couple of movies, sometimes it was just fun walking up and down the aisles looking at all of the great artwork on each movie box. Horror in particular had some rather eye-catching artwork, resulting in me renting numerous titles that helped shape my love of the genre. One title I came across early on was Jackie Kong’s horror-comedy Blood Diner, a somewhat remake to splatter legend Herschell Gordon Lewis’ Blood Feast.

The film is about two brothers, Michael (Rick Burks) and George Tutman (Carl Crew), who were brainwashed at a very young age by their serial killer uncle, Anwar (Drew Godderis), in setting out to resurrect an ancient Lumerian goddess, Sheetar (Tanya Papanicolas). Anwar’s plans were thwarted, and he was gunned down by the police. Several years later, the now adult Michael and George perform a ritual that brings Anwar back from the dead, though he is merely a brain and a set of eyes in a jar, who guides them in completing their task. The duo must collect body parts of women, sew them together and use it as an offering for Sheetar to return. The parts of the bodies from women that Michael and George don’t need get used as food for their vegetarian restaurant. Hot on their trail is Sheba Jackson (LaNette LaFrance) and Mark Sheppard (Roger Dauer), two inequitable detectives.

I was five years old when I started to get into horror films, and since most of them scared the living daylights out of me, Blood Diner was quite an odd experience. Sure, there were some pretty horrific things happening in the film; women getting butchered, a man getting his head crushed under the wheel of a car and a man being gunned down in front of children. But, Blood Diner isn’t a horror film as much as it’s a black comedy. Sure, many of the things happening in the film are gruesome, but they are done in a tongue-in-cheek manner that I hadn’t seen before when I first saw the movie.

Blood Diner quickly became one of my favorite horror films growing up, one that I enjoyed watching over and over again. It wasn’t until recently that I felt the need to watch the movie again, after losing touch with it for about twenty years. At the time that I was seeking a copy of the movie it wasn’t available on DVD here in America (though it is now, but only in a collection with a handful of other b-grade horror and sci-fi movies), so I had to settle on getting an old VHS copy.

Revisiting with a favorite film of your youth is always risky business. I used to be in love with Howard the Duck (I know… I know) as a child, but find it impossible to get through the damn thing in one sitting as an adult. So, I was a bit worried when I popped the clunky cassette copy of Blood Diner into my player a few years ago and hit play. Luckily, everything I thought I loved about the film remained the same. Its dark humor, over the top gore and eccentric characters still amount to a fantastic hidden gem of 80s horror.

Aside from the outlandish death scenes scattered throughout the film, Blood Diner succeeds because of its two central actors, Rick Burks and Carl Crew. Despite all of their murderous deeds, the Tutman brothers are a pair of charismatic individuals, which shines through due to the charming nature of Burks and Crew. There is something enjoyable about the over the top way the two murder people, especially with how much fun the two are having while doing so.

Perhaps it’s because I grew up during the 80s, but I find that many of my favorite oddball horror films come from that era. Blood Diner is one of the most unusual, but highly enjoyable horror films you could ever experience. It doesn’t take itself too seriously and knows how to have fun with its bizarre premise, all while offering a bloody good (and hilarious) time.

This Used to Be My Playground - A Personal Retrospective on Video Rental Stores

The first video rental store I went to was a locally owned one called Luciano’s Pizza & Video. It was a neat little spot that not only offered video rental, but also had a small diner you could eat in or order take out from. This was also the first place I got to experience arcade games at (Pac-Man and Tapper). This all happened around the same time that I was really getting into movies, and since the selection was so large (at least to the five year old I was) it was sometimes just fun browsing through the many titles and admiring the great cover art (particularly the horror films). A couple of other locally owned video stores popped up, my favorite of which was called Video Empire (they had two locations, both with a much larger selection of horror titles than any of the other rental stores, as well as video games!!). Things changed with the arrival of Blockbuster Video.

Quickly, the locally owned shops found that they couldn’t compete with Blockbuster, whose store was three times larger than the biggest of the locally owned stores, they had more copies of movies (though their horror section sucked) and could offer better pricing. So, it wasn’t long after Blockbuster rode into town that many of the smaller video stores I enjoyed visiting on a regular basis started closing up, until about ten years ago when Blockbuster Video became the only rental store in town.

As I’ve gotten older, I find that my time isn’t as open as it used to be. Whether it be spent on work, family, friends or sleeping, I just couldn’t find the time to stroll down to Blockbuster and rent a couple of movies, let alone watch them before they were due back. My love of films was still as strong as it had ever been, but actually going to a video store was becoming rather inconvenient. With the advent of video-on-demand (VOD) and services like Netflix, it was easier to obtain movie titles in a fashion that was a little more accessible and at my own pace. Pretty soon the thing I used to love doing (going to the video store) became something I just didn‘t care to do anymore.

About two weeks ago the Blockbuster Video (pictured above) in my area announced that it would be closing up shop on June 6th, and was currently in the process of selling all of their DVDs, Blu-Rays and miscellaneous inventory (candy, magazines, posters, toys, key chains…) at a reduced cost. Even though I hadn’t been in that store for well over seven years I still found it heartbreaking to see that it was closing down. I’m not surprised that it’s shutting down (rather, I’m more surprised at the fact that it’s stuck around for so long), but that old nostalgic feeling I have for video rental stores stirred up inside me when I read that “Store Closing” banner and reminded me of the joy I once felt as a kid whenever I walked into one of those buildings and saw all those shelves lined with movies.

I understand why places like Blockbuster Video are closing up, but it’s still a little sad to see it happen. I suppose it’s more over the fact that there won’t be the chance for kids anymore to experience the feeling of walking into a video rental store and seeing all those movies available for rental like I did (though I’m sure being able to look up a movie on Netflix and have it stream right on your television or computer right then and there is a pretty impressive site for kids).

I have no idea where the distribution of movies on home formats is headed, but I suspect that even DVDs and Blu-Rays will one day become obsolete, and that VOD will become the primary source for people to see movies at home with. And maybe one day I will write a blog about how sad seeing Netflix mail service disappear has made me. Till then, I’m happy to open up my mailbox and see those red envelops with a movie waiting for me to watch. Pity this joy is one of the many reasons why Blockbuster is going the way it is.

How Zombies Became My Favorite Movie Monster - Part 1

I can still remember the feeling I had after sitting through George A. Romero’s Day of the Dead for the first time. Though technically the second zombie movie I encountered (I saw bits and pieces of Andrea Bianchi’s Burial Ground: The Nights of Terror about a year prior), Day of the Dead was the first zombie film I watched from beginning to end. Might not sound like much of an achievement, but it was for that scared little five year old I was when I saw the film. I was in kindergarten at the time, which was split into two classes, AM and PM. I was in the PM class, which meant I didn’t have to be at school until about 11:30 in the morning. So, most mornings were spent with my dad watching movies before he went into work. One morning he happened to put a copy of Day of the Dead in, and didn’t think much that his five year old son was sitting in the living room with him. Regardless of whether or not this was bad parenting, this experience forever changed who I was, and started a lifelong obsession with zombies that is still going strong today.

As I try and rediscover my love for movies with this blog I thought it only fitting that I spent a little time revisiting with my favorite movie monster, zombies. Even though I was that scared little boy watching Day of the Dead the movie fascinated me. When the movie reached its climax, and one of the central villains (I won’t spoil who for those who haven’t seen the movie yet) gets ripped in half I was sold on zombies. Shortly after viewing this entry in the series I immediately followed it up with the other two zombie films Romero had made. Dawn of the Dead was the next film I watched, and I loved that one even more than I did Day of the Dead. Night of the Living Dead was the last of the original Dead Trilogy for me to watch, and since it came at a time when I was getting into classic cinema, the film quickly became my favorite of the series, and to date remains my favorite zombie movie of all time.

In the years since I first watched Day of the Dead my opinion on the film has altered a bit. I still love the movie and enjoy watching it from time to time, but when you compare it to the first two films it doesn’t stack up very well. This is largely in part to the fact that Romero had a much grander vision for this third, and what was supposed to be final entry in the series. But, due to budgeting issues with the studio things had to be scaled back and Romero’s vision was trimmed down to what you see on the screen now. It’s not a bad movie, just not a particularly great one.

The characters aren’t as strong or as compelling as the ones in Night and Dawn, but there are some good ones in the mix. The villainous army characters and most of the scientist are underdeveloped, with Captain Rhodes (Joseph Pilato) being a cardboard cutout of a typical control freak and Dr. Logan (Richard Liberty) feeling more like a mad-scientist reject. But, there are great characters like the alcoholic Bill McDermott (Jarlath Conroy) and helicopter pilot John (Terry Alexander) to pick up the slack. John in particular is the strongest human character in the film, and gets to say the most intelligent and well thought out dialogue that Romero put into Day of the Dead.

Then, of course there’s Bub (Sherman Howard), Dr. Logan’s prized zombie pupil. Day of the Dead was the first in the series to introduce the idea of smart zombies, a topic that would get explored more with Romero’s next zombie film, Land of the Dead (which was released nearly 20 years after Day of the Dead). Aside from the great make-up that Bub, as well as the other zombies, has (headed by legendary make-up artist Gregory Nicotero) the character stands out because of the great performance that Sherman Howard gives in the role. Dare I say that Sherman Howard plays what I consider to be the greatest zombie in cinema history? I do indeed.

With Romero’s original vision for Day of the Dead, the smart zombie (ones that were taught to perform menial tasks, and even fight other zombies or humans on command) was to play a large part in the story. You can see shades of it with Bub, but not enough for the idea to truly blossom into greatness. It’s a fantastic concept that unfortunately got watered down, and was never given a fair chance of coming to life on the big screen like it should have.

Regardless of the film’s many shortcomings, Day of the Dead is still a favorite of mine. Some see this as the best in the series, but most view it as the weakest of the original three. But, almost no one holds it against George A. Romero for not being able to deliver the goods with this one. Besides, the movie played a pivotal part in the development of my obsession with zombies. And I will always have a special place in my heart for it.